


Good

by Ailendolin



Category: Jurassic World: Camp Cretaceous (Cartoon)
Genre: And they both get one, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Guilt, Hugs, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pining, Post-Canon, Season 2 spoilers, Sharing a Bed, and their feelings, ben needs a hug, boys working through their trauma, kenji needs a hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-30
Updated: 2021-01-30
Packaged: 2021-03-16 19:34:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,927
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29087673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ailendolin/pseuds/Ailendolin
Summary: It is still dark when Kenji blinks awake. The jungle around him is quiet except for the odd call of a dinosaur every now and then.Darius could probably identify it, Kenji thinks sluggishly as he yawns and turns onto his side, ready to go back to sleep. His hand instinctively reaches out, searching for something in the dark that isn’t there because the space next to him is empty. All his fingers touch is soft fabric instead of warm skin.Kenji’s eyes fly open.After the events of season 2, Kenji and Ben have a late night talk.
Relationships: Kenji Kon/Ben Pincus
Comments: 22
Kudos: 159





	Good

**Author's Note:**

> I am very excited to share my first Camp Cretaceous fanfic with the world! I'm a paleontologist, so writing for the Jurassic franchise is always a delight for me. 
> 
> **Warnings:** This fic is set immediately post-season 2, so if you haven't seen it yet, beware of spoilers. There's also some light swearing. 
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own Camp Cretaceous, Jurassic Park, Jurassic World or any of the characters associated with these franchises and I don't make any money with this.

**Good**

It is still dark when Kenji blinks awake. The jungle around him is quiet except for the odd call of a dinosaur every now and then.

_Darius could probably identify it_ , Kenji thinks sluggishly as he yawns and turns onto his side, ready to go back to sleep. His hand instinctively reaches out, searching for something in the dark that isn’t there because the space next to him is empty. All his fingers touch is soft fabric instead of warm skin.

Kenji’s eyes fly open. All thoughts of sleep forgotten, he sits up and frantically looks around for the boy who fell asleep right next to him a mere few hours ago. The moon is bright enough that Kenji can faintly make out the others in their beds, all still sleeping peacefully. He can hear Sammy’s soft snores, Darius’s quiet mumbling, Yaz’s gentle breaths and Brooklynn’s almost noiseless sighs, and on any other night these quiet sounds would bring him comfort.

But this is not any other night. This night, Ben is back with them for the first time in weeks.

And now he’s _gone_. 

Kenji can feel his pulse quicken as a hundred horrible scenarios fill his head. He takes a deep breath and forces himself not to panic. There could be a dozen reasons why Ben isn’t sleeping peacefully next to him right now.

_He probably just went to check on Bumpy_ , Kenji tries to reassure himself. She’s sleeping below them on the ground, curled up next to the tree they rebuild their camp on, and after spending all those weeks on his own Kenji wouldn’t be surprised if Ben felt the need to seek her out.

It’s the most plausible explanation for Ben’s absence and yet when Kenji swings his legs over the side of the bed to go look for him, he can’t quite stop the worry from making his stomach turn. He can’t lose Ben, not now, not again. _Never_ again. Even the thought of it, of Ben being lost once more to the jungle when Kenji only got him back a few hours ago, is enough to make his eyes burn with old, familiar despair. Losing Ben the first time had been awful enough but losing him a second time? It’s so unthinkable that Kenji _knows_ he wouldn’t survive it.

Quietly, he tiptoes away from his bed and makes his way through the tree house towards the ladder. A small shadow stands out against the dark trees beyond their rebuilt camp, and Kenji’s body almost sags with relief when he finds Ben sitting on the edge of the platform with his legs dangling in the air and his eyes fixed on the stars.

“Ben,” he can’t help but breathe out.

Ben looks at him over his shoulder and there’s a small smile on his face when he recognizes Kenji.

“Hey Kenji.” He pats the empty space next to him and Kenji follows the silent invitation without hesitation, drawn to Ben’s side like a moth to a flame. “Did I wake you?”

Kenji shakes his head even though he has this nagging feeling that he’s lying when he says, “I don’t think so. I just … when you weren’t there I –“

He breaks off, both unable and unwilling to put into words the panic and fear he felt at the mere thought that something had happened to Ben or, even worse, that him being back had been a dream all along.

“I’m sorry,” Ben says. He looks back up at the stars. He looks weary, Kenji thinks. “I didn’t realize that being back would be this … hard. For everyone.”

Kenji feels his stomach drop.

“It’s not,” he hurries to say, suddenly scared that Ben will leave them again. “It’s really not.”

The right corner of Ben’s mouth twitches with fondness when he glances at Kenji. “Weird, then.”

“No,” Kenji says with a shake of his head. “It’s good. Having you back is really, really good.”

Ben lets out a sigh and pulls his legs against his chest so he can rest his head on top of his knees. He looks small like this, Kenji thinks – more like the boy who used to cling to him than the confident young man he pulled into his arms in the jungle.

“I’m not used to sleeping above ground anymore,” Ben admits after a moment and his voice is so solemn that Kenji can’t help but shuffle a little closer to him. “Or … not alone. I keep listening for danger but all I can hear is you guys and –“

“You don’t feel safe,” Kenji finishes for him.

His heart aches when Ben nods and lets his head hang. “Yeah.”

Somewhere far off beyond the trees, a dinosaur roars. Ben sits up, his back straight – everything about him suddenly tense and alert. His eyes sharpen as he stares into the black jungle, ready to face whatever creature is looking for a human snack right now. Seeing him like this, focused and in instant survival mode, makes Kenji realize just how much Ben has suffered out there with no one watching his back, how quickly he had been forced to grow up and change because they hadn’t been there for him. He can’t even imagine how it must have been for Ben to go to sleep each night, knowing that he wasn’t safe and that he might not wake up the next morning. 

Kenji would have given anything so Ben would have been spared that.

“It’s okay,” he murmurs softly, trying to make up for his absence now even though he knows it’s not enough. “Whatever it is, it’s not close.”

Ben lets out a shaky breath and slowly pulls up his legs again but Kenji can tell his guard is still up.

“I can share a bed with Darius if you’d rather sleep alone until we’ve built you your own,” he suggests when Ben remains quiet, picking up the threads of their conversation. “Or Sam and Yaz can share – I’m sure they wouldn’t mind.”

Ben lets out a low chuckle, and after seeing him so tense and serious just a minute ago, the sound is like music to Kenji’s sore ears. “They seem to like each other a lot, hm?”

“I think so, yeah,” Kenji confirms. In broad daylight, he would probably tease the hell out of Yaz for her feelings but here at night beneath the stars Kenji can’t help but think that it is a blessing to find friendship and love in a place like this. When he looks at Ben’s face, gentle and open once more as their eyes meet in the dark, it certainly feels like it.

“Good for them,” Ben smiles. “You can’t live in this place alone.”

Kenji frowns. “You did,” he points out.

Ben gives him a look.

“No,” he says, sounding both older and younger than he is at the same time. “I _survived._ That’s different, Kenji.” He pauses, about to rake a hand through his hair when his fingers catch on the makeshift bandana. All of a sudden, his face crumbles and his voice is shaking with emotion when he says, “ _I’m_ different. That’s what this place does to you when you have no one. It takes and it takes and it takes until you lose yourself to it. Until there’s nothing left of who you were before.” His breathing hitches. “I … I can hardly recognize myself anymore, Kenji.”

Kenji looks at him then, really looks at him. He takes in the dirty undershirt, the scratched skin, the blue bandana – the kind face that has haunted him since the day the park fell and Ben with it. Without thinking he reaches for one of Ben’s hands and holds it tight, interlacing their fingers. The skin of Ben’s palm is still as smooth as he remembers it and when he searches for Ben’s eyes, they are just as sky-blue and lovely as they were before.

“But I do,” he whispers, squeezing Ben’s hand. “I would recognize you anywhere. You’re still the same boy who braved camp even though you were terrified of this place. The same boy who bonded with a baby dinosaur that wasn’t wanted and who did his best to keep her safe.” He pauses, holding Ben’s gaze and willing him to understand what he was trying to say. “Who did his best to keep _all_ of us safe.”

Ben’s eyes drop to their clasped hands. “It doesn’t feel like I’m that boy anymore,” he confesses with a shake of his head.

Kenji gives him a thoughtful look. “Well,” he says, aiming for levity, “the bandana _is_ a bit much.”

Ben’s head snaps up but before he can react, Kenji reaches out and gently pulls the makeshift piece of clothing away. Unruly brown hair falls forward, longer than Kenji remembers it. It softens Ben’s face, and just like that he looks younger and less fierce than he did before. Kenji can’t help but stare at him, mesmerized by the change. Ben stares back at him with wide, unblinking eyes, and for a moment they are both frozen.

Unable to stop himself, Kenji lifts his hand to gently brush some strands of Ben’s hair to the side.

“There,” he says softly. “There’s the Ben I know and lo–“

He stops abruptly, catching himself just in time. His cheeks burn and his heart beats faster when he realizes what he almost said – and it only gets worse when he realizes that every word was true. It feels like a pit is opening up in his stomach and suddenly Kenji is scared to look at Ben, scared of what he will see on his face when Ben catches on. Every instinct tells him to run, to make up an excuse and take back his words, but Ben’s cold hand in his holds him captive.

“Kenji?” Ben asks, voice quiet and trembling faintly. There is nothing left of his earlier bravado, not outwardly, but when Ben squeezes his hand in comfort Kenji thinks he is the bravest boy in the world – brave enough for the both of them, and Kenji allows himself to draw courage from his strength. He forces himself to meet Ben’s eyes. They are wide in the darkness, tentative, searching and hopeful all at once. No one has ever looked at him like that and Kenji has to fight the urge to look away again. He feels like his most private thoughts and feelings are laid bare for all the world to see, leaving him more vulnerable than ever before.

But this is not the world looking at him, Kenji thinks.

_It’s Ben_.

Somehow that makes it both better and worse at the same time.

Kenji takes a deep breath and swallows around the lump in his throat before he admits in a whisper. “I wasn’t living either. Not without you, Ben. I missed you every day and I’m so sorry we didn’t look for you. If we’d known –“

“It’s okay,” Ben chokes out and a moment later Kenji feels himself drawn into a pair of warm arms. He buries his face in the crook Ben’s neck without hesitation, and it feels like coming home. “It’s not your fault, alright? It’s _no one’s_ fault. Sometimes, things just … happen.”

Kenji’s breath gets caught in his throat. “You _died_ ,” he whispers. “We thought you were _dead_.”

“I know,” Ben murmurs. His fingers tighten their hold on Kenji’s shirt. “Believe me, I know. But I’m here now. We’re _both_ here, Kenji. Together, and that … that’s good, right? That’s a good thing.”

“I hope so,” Kenji prays fervently against Ben’s skin. “Gods, I really hope so.”

Ben nods and his voice doesn’t waver when he says, “It is. And this is, too.”

His hands start moving up and down Kenji’s back then, tightening the embrace, and Kenji allows himself to get lost in the sensation of those hands holding onto him – not in fear like they used to but in wordless reassurance instead. He lets his own hands roam over Ben’s back and when his fingers skim over the cool skin above the neckline of his undershirt Ben shivers noticeably and presses himself even closer.

“I always felt safe with you, you know?” he whispers against Kenji’s collar bone. Goosebumps spread from the area all across Kenji’s chest and his arms. “Even now, when everything inside of me is screaming for me to get back down on the ground and hide, part of me feels safe. Because of you.”

As much as the words warm him, Kenji finds himself pulling back from their embrace to look at Ben. “We can sleep next to Bumpy if you like,” he says, willing to do anything to make Ben more comfortable. “I don’t mind spending the night on the ground.”

“Since when?” Ben asks him with a watery grin, and Kenji knows they’re both remembering a hundred different instances where Kenji loudly complained about missing the luxurious bed he has at home.

It seems like a lifetime ago now that mundane things like that had mattered to him, and Kenji realizes that Ben is not the only one who has changed over the last few weeks. The knowledge is oddly comforting and somehow it makes it easier to admit, “Since I got you back.”

The expression on Ben’s face is unreadable. He stares at Kenji for a moment in silence and when he pushes himself to his feet Kenji can’t help but fear that he said the wrong thing, that Ben will leave him here, alone, because Kenji couldn’t help but put his foot in his mouth once again. But then Ben holds out his hand, pulls him to his feet and gently tugs him forward – not towards the ladder like Kenji had thought he would but back towards the empty bed they had been sharing just an hour ago.

“Ben?” he asks uncertainly, not quite understanding what is going on.

“I need to get used to this again, to being around people,” Ben explains quietly as he crawls onto the bed and gestures for Kenji to do the same, a look of determination on his face. “I am not alone anymore and I can’t keep acting like I am.”

He lies down on his side and tentatively, Kenji lies down next to him. They’re closer now than they were earlier that night – close enough that Kenji can see Ben’s freckles even in the soft moonlight that filters in through the canopy above them. 

“What if you can’t sleep like this?” he whispers into the space between them.

He hears Ben take a deep breath, and a moment later Kenji can feel soft hair tickling his chin as warmth spreads along his chest and down his side. Instinctively, he wraps his arm around Ben.

“Oh,” he whispers softly.

“Yes, _oh_ ,” Ben says, a little embarrassed, and tightens his hold as if he’s afraid that Kenji will push him away. As if Kenji would ever do that. He pulls Ben closer until it becomes impossible to tell where one of them begins and the other one ends, and when the tension finally drains out of Ben’s smaller frame, all Kenji can think about are Ben’s words from a moment ago:

_I always felt safe with you._

It dawns on him why Ben couldn’t sleep earlier, why sharing a bed wasn’t enough to keep his growing unease at bay. Ben needs more from Kenji, needs to feel his arms around his body, his breath ghosting through his hair and his heart beating against his fingertips to find peace and let his guard down. Kenji is prepared to give him that and so much more for as long as Ben wants it. He will gladly hold him in his arms forever if Ben allows him that.

Kenji desperately hopes he will.

“Ben?” he asks, voice trembling with the weight of what he is about to say.

“Mhm?” Ben murmurs against his chest, already sounding like he is half asleep.

Kenji’s heart is beating so loudly in his chest he wouldn’t be surprised if every dinosaur in the vicinity could hear it. Ben certainly must, he thinks, with the way his head is resting against Kenji’s chest, and Kenji barrels on before he loses what little courage he has.

“I need you to know I … I like you a lot,” he stammers out. “Like Sammy and Yaz like each other.”

Between Kenji’s shirt and pants, Ben’s thumb finds an exposed patch of skin on Kenji’s side and gently brushes over it. “I like you, too, Kenji,” he says softly. “Very much.”

Kenji lets out a shaky breath and closes his eyes in relief. His heart calms down a little, and unable to resist any longer, he presses his lips against Ben’s messy hair.

“Good,” he murmurs.

“Yes,” Ben agrees with a smile in his voice. “Good.”

They both fall quiet then, safe in each other’s arms and content with the knowledge that they are not alone – neither physically nor with their feelings. They have found each other again, and the missing pieces they have searched for for so long finally fall back into place. There’s no gaping hole in Kenji’s heart anymore – only happiness and contentment and so much warmth he thinks he will never feel cold again in his life. He feels content and at peace, both with the world and with himself.

All because of Ben.

“I’m glad you’re here,” Kenji mumbles just before sleep pulls him under.

He feels Ben sigh against his chest. “Me, too.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Kudos and comments are always appreciated :)
> 
> I hope you enjoyed the story and my take on Kenji and Ben! If so, look out for another Benji fic I plan to post next weekend which will be about the two of them taking a roadtrip a year after they are rescued from Isla Nublar. 
> 
> You can also find me [here](https://ailendolin.tumblr.com/) on tumblr if you'd like to chat.


End file.
